THE JOURNEY OF TRANSFORMATION
Doing the work of cleaning up and clearing out
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I have been doing the work of Journaling for Transformation each morning for several years.
I pay attention to what is irritating me and one by one I address the lower realm aspects of my mind, body and spirit. Somewhere along the way I added another process to my daily devotion. I started the process of cleaning up my energetic history. |
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Journaling for Transformation was the tool I used to stop the cycles that were adding darkness to my energetic history. But once I was on solid ground, I started cleaning up the darkness in my life, my past. I found there to be dark energies that had accumulated in my body for every lower realm choice that I have ever made.
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I can continue to carry a load of stress.
I can continue to carry a load of anger.
I can continue to carry a load of worry, anxiety or resentment.
OR
I can choose to be clear and whole.
I can choose to be loving and enthusiastic.
I can continue to carry a load of anger.
I can continue to carry a load of worry, anxiety or resentment.
OR
I can choose to be clear and whole.
I can choose to be loving and enthusiastic.
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I am working on clearing up all that is blocking the expression of my natural Light, my Authenticity.
I find that my physical body is affected by my energy body. Blockages, accumulations of dark energies, interrupt my bodies’ normal capacity to function. So in my pursuit of health and vitality, I focus my efforts on cleaning up my energy body. |
"A person whose life experience is of angst for what never was,
regret for what is,
resentment towards others,
and pity for oneself
will experience a physical self that is a reflection of that energy."
Live Beautifully: A Book To Sit With
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In the beginning stages of my meditation practice I enjoyed connecting to the Light through the crown of my head. But it's like it could only get so far through me before it was blocked by densnesses. Gradually as I cleared up the blockages in my energy field, I began to experience something new. I began experiencing being connected to the Light through my crown and to the Water through my roots. I began experiencing being ever more grounded to Earth and connected to the Heavens. I called the experience being a 'Point of Union.'
I became aware of my lower chakra areas that seemed to ‘carry’ issues of falseness regarding the Divine Feminine. The chakras above the heart seemed to carry issues regarding the Divine Masculine. My hearts center carried issues of the Unity of the Divine Feminine and the Divine Masculine. |
"With peace and love
I intend to commit to connecting
with a daily meditation…."
Live Beautifully: A Book To Sit With
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As I choose to begin my day with a morning meditation and engage in Journaling for Transformation, I consistently shift into greater alignment with Love and Union, the Upper Realm. All of these choices bring health and vitality of mind, body and spirit, but they also bring about pain and suffering. Over and over again I become aware that I am holding onto the past. Any lower realm experience of the past that I haven't made peace with seems to be held in my energy body. I find that lower realm responses to lower realm experiences result in accumulations of blocking energies. As a result of these energetic blockages I experience dysfunction in my mind, body and spirit. There are streams of thought that seem like they happen 'to me,' physical pains, knots in my back, sore spots in my flesh and tension in my being. Many experiences that feel like something is 'wrong' with me.
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The voice we hear
that speaks of guilt, scarcity,
unworthiness and regret
is not Truth.
It is the result of old dark energies that plague us.
Live Beautifully: A Book to Sit With
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It seems to me that energetic blockages have a life of their own. They seem like parasites and that I am unknowingly caught up in a cycle of feeding these blockages the low energies that they need to survive. It’s like the lower realm emotions from experiences of the past created these dense energies, but once they are in place they still need to ‘feed’ occasionally to sustain themselves. The blockages crave the low vibrational frequency energies that they resonate with.
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Lower realm experiences of mind, body and spirit all have measurable degrees of vibration. Anger has a vibrational frequency. Unworthiness has a vibrational frequency. Shame has a vibrational frequency. Upper Realm experiences of mind, body and spirit all have varying degrees of frequency. Acceptance and Joy are both Upper Realm experiences, but Joy is of a higher vibrational frequency than Acceptance.
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At first I found it odd that after a time of making consistent healthier choices that I would experience internal pain & suffering. This didn't seem to make sense.
I have become aware that the blockages in my energy field need to be fed in order to be sustained. As I make higher vibrational frequency choices of mind, body and spirit, I reduce the old patterns of feeding the blockages the low energies that sustain them. And this is what causes them to flare up. |
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I choose to take a steady manageable approach on my Journey of Transformation. I move slowly and consistently one step at a time in the direction of health and healing. This approach allows for me to successfully experience transformation during the 'upheaval' phases. I am slowly and steadily ridding myself of black beans and blockages.
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With each step of changing my belief system to align with Love and Union instead of fear and separation, I make higher vibrational frequency choices. My thoughts are ‘higher,’ my food is 'higher,' my lifestyle is ‘higher’, my attitude is ‘higher.’
There is a pattern of moving to a new elevation of healthier choice, only to be followed by a decent, a crashing and a burning. The low energies that I carry can't handle the new elevations of healthier choices. After I move to a greater height, I find myself feeling all yitsy inside. I experience cravings. |
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When blockages 'come up' I find myself thinking thoughts about lower realm situations. I find myself in relationships where we are pushing each other's buttons. I engage in drama-type conservations with friends and if no one is available, I just daydream them. I may watch drama tv programs or drama in the news. Anything to generate the low–level emotional energies that feed the blockages the energies that they crave.
After generating energies like anger, frustration and worry the blockages settle down as they have been fed once again. In my pursuit of trying to always feel good, I have unknowingly fed the blockages and perpetuated their existance, thus finding myself back stuck in the same old rut once again. |
"When I am aware of my breath or reading inspired works,
it takes my attention away
from fueling the darkness
that attempts to feed on my thoughts,
my emotions
and anyone else that it can draw in."
Live Beautifully: A Book To Sit With
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I became aware that I would buy a bag of Doritos, which was not a normal part of my weekly grocery routine, only to find myself getting my period shortly after my Dorito binge.
The energies that I carried had a feeding cycle and got real hungry at this time of the month. I became aware that Doritos fed blockages the energies that they craved. I would also find myself feeding these blockages the energies of low frequency emotions. Old lower realm experiences would surface in my mind. If I reacted to these streams of thought with a lower realm response, my body would generate lower realm emotions. The energies of the lower realm emotions would feed the dark blockages that were flaring up within me. I have slowly discovered layers and layers of falseness regarding the Divine Feminine on my Journey of Transformation. |
With peace and love
I intend to be observant
when I become restless and agitated…
Live Beautifully: A Book To Sit With
I intend to be observant
when I become restless and agitated…
Live Beautifully: A Book To Sit With
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The more time I spend in a state of Awareness, the more the Light of Awareness weakens the blockages. Darkness just can’t take the high vibrational frequency of Light. High frequencies nullify low energies.
I use Live Beautifully flip books to focus my mind during the upheaval phases. Each page contains a statement of Loving Truth. By focusing my attention on these statements I 'hold my ground' mentally during upheaval. The Journaling for Transformation tools are another way to successfully ride out the flare ups and release the blockages. |
The longer I stay in a state of Awareness,
the more the blockages weaken and eventually dissipate.
the more the blockages weaken and eventually dissipate.
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I am aware that my body goes through a process of release after I successfully take a step up on my Journey. After clearing out a lower realm belief through a process of Awareness, Acceptance and then Release my body naturally shifts into a congruent alignment.
I am aware that blockages have a tendency to be in areas of my body where there are glands, like breasts and armpits. When they flare they are sore spots. As I starve them of the energies that sustain them (fear), they weaken until they release. I can report from experience that fear truly stinks. I chose to stop using antiperspirant and deoderant. Over and over I experienced a natural detox of old fear that comes out of the areas of my body where there are glands. I wash up with a green liquid soap called Miracle Soap II. This soap is amazing at clearing away low frequency 'ick.' |
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During the upheaval and detox phases of transformation I take Epsom salt baths.
Energetic blockages interrupt the natural connections that are necessary for my physical body to function. The salt water seems to bring healing by both bridging those gaps and drawing out the energies that I am ready to release. |
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Water and fat retention in areas that are experiencing a blockage flare seem to help bridge my bodies' functionality. This was especially evident during my period and later during the phase of menopause. The flaring blockages in my lower feminine chakras created the need for my body to compensate with water and fat. Once the feeding cycle was over the blockages were able to settle down and the excessive water and fat would naturally fall away. |
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Most afternoons at 1:00 I take a short nap and as I wake I experience the beginning of a ‘healing.’ I do my best to stay in a sleep/meditative/extremely-aware-of-my-energy state and I focus on a blockage. They flare and get more and more intense until usually they release in a spasm.
Sometimes it is so intense that I ask for help. Slowly my awareness that there are Divine Beings just waiting for us to ask for help is expanding. As I realize that I can ask the Angels and Ascended Masters for help, things are much easier and more productive. But they only seem to be able to help when I make an Upper Realm request. If I am motivated in some lower realm way, they don't seem to be able to honor my requests for help. It's necessary to cross the bridge of Acceptance to get to the Upper Realm and make requests that are honorable. If I remain in a state of resentment, worry, guilt or any other lower realm state, they just don't seem to be able to 'go there' with me. Thus I am increasinly motivated to align myself with the Upper Realm. |
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When lower chakra feminine blockages flare I experience physical dysfunctions. Symptoms such as: sluggish digestion and constipation; hip, leg, knee and foot problems; and a decrease in function in being able to use my finger to swipe on my Iphone. The greater the blockage flare, the more my groundedness is blocked .
As more and more blockages get released, I am experiencing the sensation of growing ‘roots.’ These are energetic connections to Creation. I feel this rootedness connecting me to the Divine Feminine, our Earthly Mother, the Water, the Universe, all of Creation... |
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I have been experiencing menopause for the past few years. This seems like one last extended PMS phase that is an opportunity for me to do the work of cleaning up and clearing out all falseness within my Being that is of the Divine Feminine.
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The image of the Tree of Life has taken on new meaning for me. I see myself as being a point of Connection, a point of Union between the Father and the Mother, the Light and the Water...
I am a child of the most blessed Union. |
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I see myself grounded to our Mother
through my rootedness and open to being nourished by the Light of our Father through my crown. I feel just like a tree. My heart is the point where the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine are united in Love. This transformative work is bringing me into being ever-more balanced in Masculinity (chakras above the heart) and Femininity (chakras below the heart). |
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Day by day I discover more black bean (fear-based) beliefs and my heart continues to clear. I have blockages down my left leg and into my left toe. (But I'm making steady progress! The buneon on my left toe that's been there for years is almost gone.) I know that ‘this too shall pass.’
Sometimes the symptoms seem to get 'turned up' to get my attention. For example, lately when I think a thought of lack and I put faith in the black bean thought, my left leg goes weak. Bam! I can be walking along and suddenly I'm like one of those little toys that stands on a pedestal held up by the tension of the strings. Push the button on the bottom and the figure collapses. I get stopped in my tracks and then once again think back to what falseness that I had put faith in that led to the dysfunction. Love is strong and creates Connection and Function. Fear is weak and creates separation and dysfunction. My physical life experience is consistently giving me feedback as to whether I am choosing fear or Love. Fear is an experience of suffering; Love is an experience of Serenity and Joy. Suffering is my Guidance system that is consistently showing me the contrast of the Way of Love and Union and the way of fear and separation. |
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I see that lower realm choices result in lower realm consequences. Some call it punishment others karmic debt. But I choose to see it as a natural process designed to help me to grow in wisdom and consciousness.
I realized somewhere along the way that the people around me were suffering from the consequences of my mistakes, thus I began to feel a deep sense of responsibility to get to the point where I could face my past choices with Awareness and Acceptance thus allowing for me to pray and ask for Forgiveness. |
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When I ask for Forgiveness from a true state of Compassion and Love it is given. It is like a karmic get-out-of-debt-free card. The process of Forgiveness eliminates the blockages and thus all that goes with them: the stinkin’ thinkin’, the cravings, the drama, the pain & the suffering.
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My healing process starts with identifying a mistake I have made… an error. I realize that all of my lower realm choices are based on lower realm fear-based beliefs. I realize that these have been handed down for generations and thus I have stopped looking for who is to blame and I just get on with putting the falseness to rest. I reach for a higher thought, a more loving belief and I use the Journaling for Transformation process to change the belief. At some point in my journey I began to just identify the fear-based thought and ask for the healing of my mind. I sit in meditation while the healing takes place.
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Once my mind is healed, I know that I will now make choices based on the new belief.* Therefore, I am no longer adding to my pile of karmic debt to be paid off. Once my mind is healed of a falseness, I can move on to cleaning up the messes that I have made. I can ask for forgiveness. I can acknowledge that I have made choices based on a false belief and I can ask for the consequences of my errors to be undone. 'Please undo the consequences of my errors’ is my prayer.
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This is a gift. A wonderful gift of forgiveness. An undoing of the natural consequences of my errors. The whole point of the experience of suffering wasn't to make me pay for my mistakes, but to motivate me to learn a lesson and thus to continue to evolve in my capacity to embody wisdom. Again I sit in meditation and receive the gift of Forgiveness. This clears up blockages. When blockages are cleared my energy body naturally expands in greater Connection to the Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine.
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In the days that follow Forgiveness I experience shifts in my 'outer life.' As within, so without. My outer life shifts to reflect the inner me. |
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I see that our Mother has laws. When we break one of Her laws, we live the consequences of it. As I became aware of this, I saw Jesus’ messages in a whole new light. Forgiveness was the miracle of the undoing of these consequences. As soon as we learn the lesson and can react with Love to a situation, there is no need to perpetuate the pattern and so it's all undone. So much so that if I experience forgiveness and try to remember what happened the next day, it is very difficult to do so. It's just all gone.
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My life’s focus has become about seeking every error I have made. At first I felt undeserving and I felt like I needed to be punished for my mistakes, but I am increasingly becoming aware that I am so very Loved and worthy of Forgiveness.
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*(When I say 'mind,' I am not limiting this to my brain. Feminine related beliefs get stored in the cells that are in the root area of our body. Masculine related beliefs get stored in the cells that are in our brain.)
Forgiveness is the open invitation to return to Love.
