Awareness of regret
an excerpt fromLive Beautifully: A Book to Sit With, by Doris Wedige
Reflections on becoming aware of the veil...
Did you ever learn something new, like a new vocabulary word or of a place in our world that you had never heard of before, and then you find yourself suddenly aware that people have been using the word or talking of the place all along, but it must have just gone right over your head? And you think, “How could I have missed this all along when it is now so obvious?”
So it is with the veil that obscures my awareness of the Truth. I am becoming aware of this illusion when I see the stream of repetitive thoughts running through my head: the pain of my past and my fears of the future. I am often so consumed by fearful thoughts that I have little capacity to enjoy life right now. I am beginning to be aware of this not only in myself, but in others as well.
How could I have felt so alone in my suffering? How could I have been so consumed by the grip of the ego that I didn’t see my neighbor in the same predicament?
In moments of Awareness we can observe ourselves with Compassion. We can see that which obscures our knowledge of the Truth as a nasty black plague infecting our beautiful souls. The voice we hear that speaks of guilt, scarcity, unworthiness and regret is not Truth. It is the ego. It is our belief in these thoughts that are not of Truth that creates the illusion that we are separate from God. When we mistake that voice for our Truth, a veil falls over our eyes and we cease to know our Oneness with All. Then instead of creating our lives with Love, we fall under the illusion of being able to control our lives out of fear. Fears that all stem from our false sense of separation from the Whole.
I want to become an observer. I want to stand still. I want to be Aware. I want to recognize the voice that speaks of fear. Watch it. Watch it come. Watch it go. Just observe.
I intend to be aware of my mind.